A year ago...

A year ago this time..I was at a different place in my life. Different job, different opinions, different goals. I made some decisions that changed my life completely. Some were positive changes that helped me get to where I am today, but some, some were negative decisions that in fact left a scar in my life. As the months passed and even into the new 2010 year, I couldn't help but meditate on the horrible choices I made in my past, KNOWING that they would cause harm, yet I still did them. I always wondered when this guilt would go away, but then when I thought about it, I told myself that it was gonna be awhile till I felt normal...seeing as I had to pay for what I did...even after months, and months, and months had passed by..I still needed to suffer.Through all the hours spent going back on all that I did, and the constant trap I had myself in....I can officially say...I have let go and it feels amazing. It wasn't until a recent conversation with one of my best friends that I realized I was the one keeping myself boxed, I wasn't the one that let go. God had already forgiven me way back when, He didn't even know what I was talking about when I would apologize for all that I had done. So now...during this time of reflection, I know I have done things in my past that I regret, that I realllllllllly wish they invented a time machine now so I would be able to scrap that from my life, but I'm thankful for it . I have learned so much, seen so much, and done things that I shouldn't have-but I am stronger. I am wiser, I understand the choices I make, never ever EVER stop at just that, but rather affect my tomorrow and future. Don't keep yourself locked up in your own guilt, let go and live. Realize it was a mistake and remember the secret to life....we mess up EVERYDAY every second...were humans. But what makes us different is what we learn from our mess up's...do we continue to live our lives...or give up and remain trapped in our own pitty?
Throw down your thoughts.

"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom" Anais Nin

Why and how God is like sand

The one thing I can't stand about the beach is the fact that no matter how hard you try, you always seem to end up leaving with sand everywhere on your body, bags, blankets, and even in places we really wish sand wouldn't get into. You shower, shake off your shoes, put your bathing suit in a plastic baggy, yet sand is still there. This past Saturday I went to the beach with a friend and during a deep conversation I was having with one of her cousins about God, life, and all that good stuff, it hit me. Like a lightbulb, I realized the similarity between God and sand.

Like sand, no matter how hard you try, you can't get rid of God. He shows up everywhere in your life. Espeacially when your trying to shake Him out most, He just keeps showing up. Like sand, God gets into the places in our lives we realllllly wish he wouldn't get into. Whether it's a realtionship we know we shouln't be involved in, or we're going down a negative path knowing that no good can come from it, or even having the attitude of "It's okay God, I don't need you..I got this one". In reality, we have no idea what were doing and are in desperate need of His guidance. Luckily we have a God who knows just when to interceed and save us when we don't have a clue about what's going on.

Embrace His presence in your life, even when He is in those gray areas of our lives.
Because though sand is a killer for being everywhere, it is a sweet reminder of the good times at the beach, and a sweet reminder of God's plan in our lives :)

Opinions are welcomed ;)